I'm jammin out to some Brit Birt, she's still my bitch, I love her crazy ass
Canada is now making docos about life in America. Its called Trailer Park Boys.
my vagina's been through so much this weekend
you mean so much has been through your vagina this weekend?
I just noticed that when I sneeze...my nipples get hard.
All I remember is yelling RUN as fireworks started going off in the kitchen. Who said that was a bad idea?
It's like my butt was the only innocence I had left and now I don't even have that.
I need moral support for this bender
I planned on emotionally scarring him for life this weekend. DAMN YOU PERIOD!
Is there a polite way to say "Sorry for your head injury but I still want to hook up"?
She flashed us last time and pissed all over the floor this time. I'm scared to invite her back.
Dude it's 6 am and you just invited me to a hotel with a shit ton of coke. Best morning ever
It's very finicky. Like baking. or BDSM.
I woke up alone, naked in her bed staring at a lifesize poster of edward cullen,actually I'm lying I did have socks on
Flight got cancelled. Stayed in the same hotel as the flight crew so now I can cross Sex with Pilot off the bucket list
He regularly flies into DC, so I’m going to sign him up for my Frequent Flyer program!
yes that’s a photo of a horny gay donkey
Oh I know. I’ve known many horny gay donkeys in my time.
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