I puked a lego.
Discovered the coffee filter hasn't been changed in a while. I believe the mold has hypnotic properties. Would try it again, but coffee vomit is not pleasant.
the girl next to me in class is drawing a guy banging a chick doggy style...its very detailed
im not an educated person. i just do things. and it works out in my favor
I just found out that the liquid capacity of my breasts is 700ml each. I should not be left alone at home when drunk.
My arms are hairy. And so Is my left leg. Just my left leg, the right is smooth.
Sorry for rubbing my feet on you and repeating "good pony, stay."
Question: If I got in a car accident and lost my memory of us, would you work your way back just so we could be fuck buddies again?
I'm watching The Vow and just need to know that I'm loved in some way
CSI Miami is on and the guy is trying to save this woman who got shot. By stripping off his shirt & belt. THE WOMAN NEEDS YOUR PANTS OFF TOO
THE CEO RESPONDED TO THE MEMO WITH HIS "UNICORN" EMAIL ADDRESS AND NOW HE'S APOLOGIZING TO EVERYONE FOR USING HIS PERSONAL EMAIL AT WORK.
He overslept for our prescheduled morning sex. The fact that my vagina isn't enough to get him out of bed was the last straw.
WE JUST PASSED A FUCKING SPACE SHIP! NOT JOKING! A REAL FUCKING SPACE SHIP! THIS IS NOT THE DRUGS! SPACE! SHIP!
let me wake up, find my pants, and find out where i am tommorow and ill get back to you on that
I love how when he said ecstasy pills both of our heads whipped around like a couple of horned owls.
you'll kiss me after i give you a blowjob but you wont kiss me after I eat apple sauce? am I the only one who sees something wrong with this?
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