I like it. Barfy the gin-flavoured Assman
So my shaver died while I was trimming...ya know. And now it is half way done. I don't think there's currently any aesthetic in keeping it this way...
i am officially better prepared for a hangover tomorrow than i was for christmas.
It's not kidnapping if it's romantic
He posted a picture of my bra on facebook with the caption "I don't know who I hooked up with last night but if this is yours please come pick it up".
Coming home soaking wet at three am and trying to convince the front desk man that we came from the library might have worked if I wasn't also roaring at everything.
You're being dramatic. You can calm down, or you can piss off. Either way, I ate your burrito.
I'm going to a foam party and gonna grind someones dick off hayy
Also, just almost microwaved cereal. Thank god mom is here to stop me.
Who are these men, what are we doing here, how is this helping us toward our goals of sex and pasta? Things to consider.
Remember camping when you drank 36 beers to yourself in one day and puked in your tent? Ready for round 2?
Only he would come to a strip club and talk about an internship with Walt Disney during a lap dance.
I kept resisting the urge to yell "2 for 2!" so they could hear me on the other side of the wall.
Also I've been at work for an hour and I've already been "honey"d "babe"d and "beautiful"d by three separate men. Apparently hungover with yesterdays make up looks good on me.
yea so the plan to relive our college glory days was great and all but ending up in the er with alcohol poisoning was crossing the line
Randomize
