I cockslap morals
FYI, if you pee in my bed (or even let R___ and E___ sleep in it), I will fart loudly during your wedding vows. Trust.
I'm thinking we should try to start remembering stuff we do. Althought I kinda like feeling like Nancy Drew the next morning.
More like the Hardy Boys cause its kinda like a team effort.
He said he had a gf but the monogamy was "only implied".
there is just no excuse for touching your mothers vagina.
I'm having horrible flashbacks of being groped by Pauly Shore.
I came back and almost ran over two people passed out in my driveway I've never met before in my life
My boobs are feeling quite sensitive so I told them, " you is smart, you is kind, you is important" that should do the trick.
A big toe in my vag is not foreplay.
Code 10 We gotta leave. Now. I took a dump in the upstairs toilet and its clogged and overflowing, and believe me I don't want to have to explain myself to this frat on parents weekend.
NATIONAL GIVE A BOSTON COP A BLOW JOB BITCH ROAD TRIP NOW
At least you didn't wake up next to your professor who then proceeded to cancel class via phone while still inside of me.
Had sex in a blanket fort. How was your weekend?
I masterbated to his instagram page. Too far or....?
You had a 45min conversation with the Ronald McDonald statue I have the video to prove it
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