O no, u 2 are dating again?
No. I just masturbate furiously to his picture
I still don't understand how I went from crying to blowing you in like two minutes.
Your 'drink of the future' makes sense now- you feel it for atleast 10 hours into the future
My dad caught me fucking in the pool last night. He proceeded to tell me I needed to "quiet things down" while this guys dick was still in me. Worst daughter ever.
Watch the news tonight. They interviewed me about a fire. I was high as balls so it should be entertaining.
Im playing lifeguard in my own bathroom. How's ur night?
He puked in the voicemail. That's a true friend right there.
2012 needs to end already. I've exceeded my quota for People Who Have Accidentally Seen My Tits.
This guy on the bus keeps leaning over and sniffing my hair.
He said he could outsmoke me so I challenged him to a weed duel. I don't always very competitive but when I do...
I'm disease and pregnancy free. This is an Easter for the books!
3 cups of coffee and some molly. The "Tay's Day Off Diet"
Sex on the trampoline with your two best friends cheering you on: PRICELESS.
I’m going to cut back. New Year, New Me
I would never wish less dick on anyone but do what you gotta do
I can appreciate that you picked up the hot drummer, but don’t have sex in front of my house lmao
Randomize
