You wanna call me after your homoerotic shower?
...i had to draw her a diagram of her own vagina. including a little arrow to the clitoris. shouldn't it be the other way around?!?
We've got 2 weeks of college left-I want to feel like Gary Busey by graduation.
Im holding a competition......who saw me last, and who knows how my nose got bruised? you earn points for answering either question. and for bringing me water.
You know, be my cock's hype man.
Is moral bankruptcy something you need to file for?
I need the number of a restaurant that delivers, has lock-picking abilities, and is okay with full frontal male nudity. Entirely too hungover to get out of bed.
I mean, I introduced myself as "the after party". I think he knew early in the night he was in for a bangathon.
We're gonna be late. Scott went too far predrinking amd tried pierce his own lip with a poptab. Save me a beer, i'm gonna need it.
i found waldo and immediately set him to work eating me out. please have more out of season costume parties.
I feel like dick that good should always be within a five kilometre radius of me.
I have to tell him to stop eating me out so I'm not late for work; my life could be a lot worse.
Why is there a business card for people who need bail bonds in my wallet...
Im playing a game I have to take a drink every time my gram asks me the same question hammered by 4 guaranteed
I'm drunk and don't know where I am. There's a giant metal penguin if that helps.
Randomize
