how can i change my meal plan to a keystone plan?
Seeing him suck some chick's face on VH1 wasn't exactly how I imagined the "we should see other people" conversation going.
I asked about his 3 inch scar on his chest. It's from when he had to castrate a bull on the estancia. Apparently this is how good bull meat is made.
She pointed at me and told her friend, I'm going to fuck him, its going to be really loud, so yes, i need the whole basement.
Pretty sure that drunken football on the back porch with 6 guys with a champagne bottle was a bad idea....
How much do you charge for your Funyun and beer delivery service?
I like how zombie Abe Lincoln and hooking up with a girl were on your same thought process.
i may or may not have triedto pee like a boy and then dipped cheese ino the olive oil
Decided to make myself tequila gummy bears but got impatient and just drank the bowl of tequila.
I rewarded myself with Taco Bell tonight for going a full week without punching my roommates in the face or wishing bodily harm on them.
I checked her ID this morning. Lets just say...she's older than my mom
I want a dick in my left hand and a Crunch Wrap Supreme in my right hand.
I gave her a cheerful high five and she turned to me and said, "we should do that with our genitals." I may have to marry this girl.
I know we agreed to cock block each other from now on buttt I WANT this one. I have felt his penis, it is godly, and I am going to have it inside of me, so shut the fuck up and leave.
Woke up at 5am in an elevator... Pretty much tells you how my weekend went.
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