I want to take you away to a place of dolphin rides and hot stone massages.
he threw mangos from the tree he was in at people and got arrested for harassment
cruising supermarkets, asking random people where i can get weed. fuck alaska
Having an 'SDSU Mom' sticker is just like say 'Hi, my daughter has an std"
Only you could manage to look like a complete slut while wearing a turtle neck.
I crashed her parents' car cause she was giving me road head. Its probably best to just let them think I'm a bad driver.
Idk what else to talk about besides you paying for half of my vaginaplasty.
seriously when did my vagina become a soup kitchen for the poor
This shit I'm taking feels like I've eaten every burrito in the world and chased that with an aquarium of hot sauce.
And by "schedule" I meant crumbled up liquor store receipt, that I wrote shit on.
I think one of my ovaries is committing suicide. But that is a topic for another day.
She took her panties off, then farted in my general direction. I guess we're at that stage in our relationship.
7% of guys ive been with can get me off... I did the math!
Is it bad I use my AA meeting to hookup with guys?
My professor just told my lab he could drive us around town in his 1991 Lincoln towncar limo for our bar crawl. This just keeps getting better!
Randomize