i permit you to call me
i thought she was just hairy. i didn't know she was also a man.
she said, "is it ok if I touch it?" that's when I knew I was in trouble... I knew she was a virgin but seriously..
I woke up hungover and opened my laptop to find that i had googled alcoholism again
They had some plan b on the table between the beer and the guacamole. Yeah, it's gonna be a fun party.
she ate the whole pudding cup using only her tongue. i'm considering going lesbian for her
i just opened a bottle of wine with my dads power tools
I just spewed blue gatorade in the shower. It looked like the ocean.
Can we ask the Hungry Howie's guy to pick up some blunt wraps on the way over?
Coming out of the blackout mid beej was nice. Seeing her face was not.
It feels kinda weird thanking you for sucking my dick, but I just don't know what else to do right now
Holy fuck where did this cat tattoo on my ass come from
there is something very satisfying about getting tacos after hours of sex.
you know it was a good night when you wake up with a medal around your neck
I had more orgasms than hours of sleep this weekend. I’m going to keep him around a while
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