toast her oven
toast her strudel
inspect her gadget
the toilet has never flushed louder then when you sneak home drunk and try to avoid your parents hearing you puke.
Just because i have a masturbation problem doesnt mean you can put 20 photos of Jesus in my room.
And then she proceeded to fling her bra around while screaming the rocket power theme song, still managing to not fall off the skateboard
so this was truly a case of the blacked out leading the blacked out.
It's like God was speaking to me through a penis.
Ok see being that I'm not present or participating your vague texts "neeeeed that" and "vagina" leave a lot to question.
I just found that video of you jumping onto my exercise ball feet-first and face-planting into my shoe rack.
Hey. Me and my buddy are drunk. you wanna give us tattoos of the hawaiian punch guy we shall pay very well. Seriously dude. no bull shit.
She's dipping the chocolate graham crackers in marshmallow vodka for a 'campfire taste'
I was just sitting on the ground alone in fetal position shivering and chewing on my hand when she found me. ecstasy was not my best idea.
He just whispered "doors are weird" and then laughed so hard he fell down the stairs.
fuck emotions I should've gotten more cats
I just stood beside an Amish man and bought Cocoa Krispies and tampons.
It was very surreal. They were listening to a religious podcast on morality while they both went down on me.
Randomize
