I stuck it in and pulled it out
Did she like it?
She giggled?
She liked it
The funny thing is... I'm about to go to the store to buy WD-40 and condoms... That's it.
And before you ask they are unrelated purchases.
You don't understand, alcohol has become a thing of survival for me and without it I can't function as a normal human being
As it would turn out, "jesusssssss" is not the password to enter Faith Chapel's wifi network.
he was already passed out before we got there, so i already knew i was going to like him
How sober do you have to be to donate blood?
considering how much of last night I don't remember and the amount of ones laying on my desk right now, it's safe to say I'm concerned
He wants to make love to me in a sea of paint and wash my tears away with the brushes surrounding us..I've known him for 2 days.
I'm sexting at the thanksgiving dinner table...this is a new holiday tradition.
Lying on this bed is like lying on love and marshmallows and joy
Now that we have successfully procreated, I need to know we are on the same page. Please tell me you are aware that there are whole seasons of our lives that our child can NEVER be made privy to.
We should probably write this down. That's a shit load of shit.
i feel sensations at the ends of my beard. Either I am super high. Or my face has accepted my beard and I completed my transformation to Mecca
He's talking about feelings now. I don't even know if he came???
i had a flashback to you roaring like a dying tiger and then throwing your wallet (maybe?) at the cat in the living room and saying "you're the only adult that lives here take all my money"
My roommate has a sixth sense about my jerking off and walks in EVERY. SINGLE. TIME.
Randomize
