wow. When I'm done with him he's going to have to pop his collar in necessity and not just douchery
I'm either going to be a Playboy Playmate or take over the world. Either way the world wins.
my lips still taste like vagina
so you liked breakfast?
ehh, still wish we woulda went to IHOP instead
people from other dorms came to marvel at the dump i took. i had a bio major take a picture.
I was in bed at 845. Affairs take a lot out of people
found a half eaten roll befind my toilet today. my birthday just keeps popping up.
that bitch in the red sedan is still teasing me with the ice cream cone. i'm going to show her my dick
Oh, and trying to figure out who wants to do Molly in a frat is like asking damn children if they want puppies and candy. So just bring as much as possible.
You know you're hung-over when you're smoking and have the strong urge to eat the cigarette. No more buckets of gin. No. More. Ever.
How do you respond to a booty call from yesterday?
Can't find our DD
He's backstage giving the strippers foot massages.They kidnapped him the moment he walked thru the door.
There they were doing the deed on the beach, looked like two seagulls fighting over a chicken bone.
He was doing dishes, naked. I dropped to my knees and gave him head. Teamwork level- pro..
I HAVE A TEST I'M SORRY YOUR UN SUCKED DICK ISN'T MY FIRST CONCERN
"suitors" is just a nice way of her saying "the guys i'm fucking"
Randomize
