there's just something about her that screams "i'm into chicks who wear flannel"
we used the bottom of a tampon for coke since no one had a 20 on them. My life has resisted to this.
laying naked on couch sucking water through straw. i can still feel the orgasm from last night. thank you mdma.
I hope I bought a crossbow. Also I need to not drink that much
I'm hiding her cosmo magazine. the only sex tip she needs is to not handcuff her boyfriend to her roommates bed and lose the key
Some guy dressed like Santa just handed me a bottle of tequila. I NEVER WANT TO LEAVE CANCUN
I plan on being naked for at least 2/3 of the wedding.
Sorry for rubbing my feet on you and repeating "good pony, stay."
Some guy offered you 100 bucks last night to suck your toes. I had to drag you away while you were yelling at me, "Stop money cock blocking me!"
That's just where I'm at in my life.
I can't imagine anything that has a removal ass flap as being sexy
How was it playing wingman?
I feel like I was rockys coach watching him get the shit beaten out of him by Apollo creed
No dude. I can't think of anything LESS sexy than yodeling
i just want to die with dignity and clean teeth, is that too much to ask?
Between the deep breathing and nipple piercings , I thought I was in the twilight zone
So now your dad has seen my tits. You could have told me he was coming by to help paint.
I didn't think you'd be painting the kitchen topless.
I couldn't find a shirt I was willing to ruin.
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