idk, it's all black and i hear low talking...
dude, i think you're in initiation!
shit. that's not good.
I just caught myself dancing like an old lady in the shower. Have I reached the age where booty dancing stops and swaying of the upper body begins?
I don't plan to be alive for 2010 so ima say this 12 hours early. Happy New Year bitches
bark. im thoroughly looking forward to kegs and eggs. next weekend should be pancakes and pinnical, then cereal and seagrams and then whiskey and waffles.
You told her to step on the scale because you had whiskey goggles, and scales don't lie.
dude you said you were going to be a human flag and climbed the telephone pole and fell in front of a car
Sorry about sucking tonight. Drunk truck fucking is apparently not my strong point.
Do you ever feel like a plastic bag?!
Welcome to the difference between being FWBs (remember how we used to see who could get more lap dances a night?) and being in a relationship. Fun, huh?
It is unclear if my flaming esophagus is hangover induced.
It would have been nice to break the dry spell with nice, civilized, sober sex somewhere other than on my friend's couch.
My dry spell starts kindergarten this fall...
They grow up so fast.
Yeah just pls explain the dishes and the dildo. I don't want to lose my job over a dick in the cooler.
you were on all fours in the front yard puking, but managed to hand the pizza delivery guy a beer and to have a nice day.
You were so drunk last night that you fell thru the bathroom door at the bar, ripping it off the hinges in the process. But, your birthday tiara stayed on thru the whole thing. I'd call it a succcessful evening. Happy birthday kiddo!
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