Dont worry, she is sitting right next to me. She is making it clear she wants to scissor
So I finally got the Patron washed off my boobs.
this stripper weighs a pound. I feel like I should tip her in food.
You don't have to be drunk! I've licked your asshole before
i secretly love the power trip of being their RA & busting these idiots for everything i did as a freshman
Now she's making me sit here and look at pictures of guys she likes who look like bears. She's calling them her bear friends.
Power went out. She lit a candle and gave me head. Made some pretty impressive candlelight cocksucking shadowpuppets. Must be what porn was like in olden times.
Scary truckers and hobos. These are the men I attract
That's how all the girlfriends are. Oh he's a boy, no worries, then BAM. I blow their boyfriend.
I'm not gonna lie, my internet creeping skills scare me. I'm like Liam Neeson in Taken
He just used the word frick. Is that a possible red flag?
Currently looking up Winnie-the-Pooh porn.
I said "one day" and that day is not today
Had a dream we were competing for tomatos.
I'm sorry for chipping my tooth on your vagina last night :(
Randomize
