She's hot and she went to Notre Dame. I want to fuck the Catholic right out of her
What happened at the top of the stairs is never to be spoken of again.
someone left their shoes, a resume, and a pizza in the shower... i am actually speechless
I think he finally resigned to the fact he could not get off. He just looked at me and said "I'm having testicle difficulties," rolled over and passed out.
How is it possible that i have sex with a guy and he makes YOU breakfast
My mom woke me up in a bubble bath this morning.
I'm pretty sure my moms getting nailed in the bathroom right now while I'm chaperoning. God damn it.
For the first time in my life, I paid for my own alcoholic beverage last night. Am I getting ugly?
To be honest, kinda.
I told him I was engaged, had 911 on speed dial and made him wear his seatbelt, then dropped his drunk ass off at his motel...probably not the night he was expecting.
uhh when the x-ray tec was moving your head you licked his hand and meowed.. i think he knew you weren't sober
Sorry the STD update turned into an attempt at a bootycall, but at least we both know we're clean now
I'm afraid you are becoming too bourgeois with your switch from boxed wine to bottled.
Drink a bottle I wine by yourself? Treat yo self
Thanks for taking care of me. I hope I didn't pee in your car.
Was that before, or after strip tac toe.....
Randomize
