I just saw a hobo shake a payphone until it spat out a bunch of quarters. what a champ.
i just fucked the bartender on my cruise to get free alcohol. have things gone too far?
I took my pants off in the cab and tried to bite his ear. Not going oout for awhile
Get out here. Doing shots with the delivery guy. Also, the food is here
okay. this is james and youre probably never ever gonna see me again unless i really really really want some pussy. sorry.
Sometimes I look at the people in school that are obviously very diligent and on top of their studies, and then I wonder why they don't smoke weed.
THIS IS THE EMERGENCY BOOZE SYSTEM. I AM EN ROUTE TO DEWITT WITH A FIFTH OF TEQUILA. THIS IS NOT A TEST
He was bigger soft than my ex was hard. A gold medal rebound.
it was like fucking a Mumford & Sons song
It's getting harder and harder to fake orgasms as I get older.
My new roommate is awesome. His father owns a bar and his sister has an E cup. I'm going to be with him forever
Adulthood is making your own puke bucket.
I have an interview tomorrow! The couple we regularly swing with said I could use them as references. Winning
All I want is some guy to eat me out while I work on grad school things then go on his way
I just fuked with kevins application and made it say that he does conjugal visits for community service
hey some people donate their time while apparently kevin donates his body
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