Best porno line to date...."drinks are on me..." while she female ejaculates into a wine chalice
Does it really count as two different guys if they're brothers? I like to think of it as one and a half.
i realized really quickly that drinking a bottle of vodka and 3 crystal light packets wasn't the best idea i've ever had
Yeah i knew he wasn't okay when he told me he was "seeing his vision"
I have no idea. I think this is what happens when people take drugs in the middle of the day
We hit a golf ball off Brady's ass. His dignity flew away into the night.
Just wait til you visit, there will be an endless supply of fresh dick for your demand #economics
Just because he told you it was safe doesn't mean you should have licked it.
Whatever I'm getting wasted, my costume's bomb, and there's a good chance I'm getting laid. Not letting stupidity ruin my night!
By chance and just chance did you find a cock ring? By chance
My dad told me I would need to be my mom's DD tonight. So, that's how my Easter weekend is going down.
My cat is watching me play with my new vibrator
i spent my Thursday drinking before noon and not wearing pants
Just let me put on a bra and brush the alcohol out of my hair.
I wasn’t trying, but work got a lot easier and more fun once he starred flirting with me and looking at my ass
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