Canada is now making docos about life in America. Its called Trailer Park Boys.
my mom sold the house because of the grow room the couple saw i had in the basement.
I'm not being over dramatic, but I think my heart is going to stop beating.
apologized to him about 10 times for being drunk. told him about 15 times that he was "really pretty"
I left puerto rico a week ago and my vagina still smells like coconut.
We played strip Bananagrams and I won. Thank fuck I read a lot as a child.
And the best part is I don't remember putting the condom in my pocket! Angels officially exist
It was relaxing until your penis crawled in my ear.
No. If I hated you would get none. Then I would eat them all in front of you and laugh at your tears. Although that hasn't been ruled out for entertainment purposes. Nothing purposeful.
I was trying to pee in the bushes and the person who lived in the house where the bushes were planted started knocking on the window to get me to stop peeing in their bushes
He found a way to charmingly ask me for a threesome and when I said no he made it sound like he was even happier. He's a fucking wizard
That was the night I passed out and someone threw chicken at me. SORRY I wasn't available to cockblock you from that Hispanic dude.
But don't thank me for faking being asleep, if I was the real wing man, I would have left the bed
Holy shit, add "successfully got stoned secretly at a party where a cop was" to my list of accomplishments.
He’s 21. The president of his frat. I’m 28 and have a career!
Do it. It’s a noble position.
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