he just said he'd buy the porn
its a step up from the last guy
your ex dropped by. you can call me dwight howard, cuz im the king of rebounds
Just heard the garage door open and I immediately sprinted to the laptop to erase history, even though I haven't watched porn today...I believe Pavlov now.
It was some time between the gurgles of her blowing me to us throwing up in the same bucket afterwards that I realized we would be doing this a lot.
I don't think my body can handle the alcohol I want to put in it anymore.
He just climbed off me and used my hairspray to fix his hair. If he hadn't just gone down on me I would think he's gay.
Call me as soon as you're able to dial a phone. I just took a shit behind a building in broad daylight and need to get the fuck outta here soon.
You. Me. Frosting and a bed. Lets do this.
I will suppress my appetite by doing shots then passing out
If we accept the love we think we deserve do we also accept the sex we think we deserve?
I can't blame him for thinking that then, placing a cone shaped potato chip on the tip of his penis post bj is not a normal act of love
Chose not to courtesy flush and the CEO huffed the result. I feel powerful.
In 2014 only three boys have seen my boobs so far
He wouldn't shut up so I started sending him pictures of animal dicks
The only people allowed to make me cry are myself and Chris Hemsworth as Thor. And me.
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