yeah well you didnt even puke from the alcohol. we cut you off and went to huck finn's and told you that the "irish cream" coffee creamers had baileys in it, so you shot down like eight of them and puked all over the floor. it was great. we cheered you on and everything
i was like a deer caught in headlights with its coke-dick hanging out
just as he was about to cum he started shouting "I THINK I CAN! I THINK I CAN!" over and over again.
dude uncooked spaghetti noodles dipped in thousand island dressing is better than it sounds
He fucked a visibly pregnant girl. It doesn't get weirder than that.
we found a loaf of bread in my bathroom i believe its yours. sorry i took a shower before we noticed so it might be soggy
I'm really starting to miss his dick. Like so much I'm actually tempted to try and work things out with him again.
cops woke me up on the sidewalk and asked where my shoes are.. fuck if i know, im sleeping on the sidewalk! actually i didnt say that, i just cried until they gave me a ride home.
Besides he said his dick was as big as a loaf of bread and that it was broken. So I was like u have half a head of hair and a broken dick that looks like bread. No thanks. Im good.
did you just send me my own nude
I am one with the molecules
We played a 4 hour game of True American then we fucked on the floor for a couple hours Happy 20th to me
I'm smoking and watching the Muppets Treasure Island. Where are you?
Something about that statement reminds me just how much of a role model you are, sis.
Oh don't mind my cushion, I got plowed in the ass by a freight train last night
I am putting clothes on to go find a brownie
In my experiences, brownies are better naked.
Randomize
