I just accidently tagged myself in the picture of the 16 year olds spreading their legs in bikinis. Failure.
i googled "the goonies drinking game." i may be alone, but i'm living the college dream.
i say over christmas we have a beer pong competition with the cousins and see who really has the best genes in the family.
she was home schooled till college. were she learned how to give the most amazing blowjobs is still a mystery.
i just wanna lock my vagina in a safe filled with bandaids and healthy things
Well this lady at the bar told me I was a natural on the tambourine and that it was my God given talent. and then she gave me a tambourine.
I invented the best game. It's called "what touched my exposed nutsack?" It can range from pillows to toothbrushes
Would it be sharing too much to tell you that my nipples hurt so much that I couldn't comfortably go down the stairs?
I can't wait for you to tell me about your sex.
It's a short, short story.
The convent might be a nice break from real life
Me: I shouldn't go to the airport bar it's too expensive and I don't need it. Dark me: SHOTS AT 7 AM
Just a little. Like do I say "hey I'm the girl that's fucking your son, nice to meet you"
Do not confuse my plans for being an adult though. I will ABSOLUTELY be practicing suturing, on my porch, while getting stoned.
I’m mid 4sum and you’re sending me photos of your cat. We had very different evenings.
Nothing much. Just taking shots of tequila before I go get a bikkini wax. You?
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