There is no way when we get home that nothing will hapen
That's why Kanye is a gay fish.
He just knocked over the beer pong table... I haven't seen so much fail in one room since I watched "Mall Cop" with my grandma
I just remember making out with this kid's friend, washing blood off my hands and hearing the RA's were looking for me.
My three rules on what I'm wearing tonight. Something short, something see through, and something i had sex in.
I don't remember much of half-time. I do remember climbing onto the roof of the fraternity and telling people I was going to stargaze in French.
We need to tone down the drinking before our 7pm class. I don't remember receiving any of these handouts.
I remember us getting kicked out of the bar, but neither of us know why. We woke up next to chicken bones on a plate with spoons, and my car has mud all over it including places where feet shouldn't be, like the speakers on the car door.
The only way he could ever pleasure me is if he lit himself on fire and let me watch
Just leave a note saying "riding dick see you in the mornig"
Just had to break it to that one guy that I can't sleep w him bc he looks identical to my brother. So how's your morning?
He listens to me complain and in return I send him naked pictures. It's a win win situation
he just got here with a handle of tequila and box of condoms. looks like i'll be spending the weekend in bed
I feel like everything in my life has been preparing me for my future sex robot experience
You’re so close!!!
Just boned her on my desk. on top of my term paper. take that professor dipshit
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