It was just so hard to get through Conan without crying like a baby. I'm just so proud of him.
apparently i traded the tiffany necklace my mom bought me for 2 shots and next in line for beer pong at the frat.
I feel like after all he sees, the dog needs to get baptized.
This will be amazing. Plus he's going to do a line of cocaine off of the other guy's ass.
We fucked in my basement while hiding from the cops.. And now his Facebook picture is him and others holding up there MIP's in front of my house.. I feel obligated to add him as a friend.
I just sent you a google doc listing all the reasons why I should stop hooking up with him. Feel free to add to it.
Also, we accidentally donated a bong to goodwill
i get the sense she is planing new and exciting ways to physically harm me during sex
Thanks i'm proud of you and I'm proud of beer and vodka for making me drunk
Because you work where i will be drunk tonight I'm asking you. Is a shirt required on Halloween?
it is a dangerous dangerous place where morals and dignity go to die and all your fantasies about men become reality.
How do I tell your little brother I lost my virginity wearing nothing but his socks?
Formal letter or email.
Ok thats it i need a list. Full names, nicknames, in which frats, with a photo, of all the guys youve hooked up with because three of the same guys is ridiculous
On another note- any interest in going to a gay bar to hit on 19yr olds?
So I "accidentally" brought my road beers into church for this wedding
And they fell out of my pocket on the pew. Made quite a noise...safe to say I'm batting a thousand
Randomize
