All these guys look like the American Apparel version of Jesus...
Odds of those being real?
One in who gives a fuck
I just applied for an unsubsidized loan naked. I love the internet.
I'm sweating while I eat mac and cheese. That fat.
And then she apologized after the blow job for being too sick to deep throat. I'm in love..
Nice. I ate a jello shot out of a bovine blow up doll's love hole last night
One reason I feel like garbage: Kraft single wine shots
I fell asleep on the air hockey table and someone turned it on, scariest shit ever when you're that fucked up
Thanks to a poorly written tweet a whole bunch of people thought I died last night.
Blood everywhere...karaoke was nice
I stepped in puke last night then washed it off my shoe with beer. Is there a grace period to respect before wearing them to class?
I can't even be mad at customs in houstons airport anymore for missing my flight and having to stay overnight. Within an hour of meeting we did it at her place. Her last word being "glad I could show you real southern hospitality". I'm definitely coming back here someday
Sorry, was sleeping. I heard a rumor that I had a hangover, so I just went with it...
Her cat was breathing in my ear all night, like that kid from Hey Arnold.
I just kept eating and watching him slide down the stairs head first
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