do you want me to make hamburgers?
i'm vegan
i'll put lettuce on them
her boobs were like sundried tomatoes..
"Does your mom know how big your cock is?" Worst dirty talk I've ever had.
my cabbie only has one arm...this can't be safe
i just ran into my boss at the liquor store. we didnt exchange words, just nodded in mutual understanding.
She just ended a sentence with "and he doesn't even mind my herpes..."
Multiple bruises and a hell of a headache later, I have still to find out where the fuck I picked up the bottom half of a mannequin.
Exactly, there's no such thing as commitment at foam n' glow
Hello my rib-scented angel!
He just said "I know you want my cock" and I said nah. I want food bro
The only people allowed to make me cry are myself and Chris Hemsworth as Thor. And me.
I just said "you do you" to my penis.
Just found out the last guy I hooked up with is being held in a federal prison under suspicion of stealing 175k.
Stoner thoughts are the only thoughts I want to have now.
I want you to worship my cock.
That's not how you start a conversation.
Randomize
