Down for casual relationships, more fun than catholic missionary, bring condoms and don't get attached.
Me + Nice restaurant + Copious amounts of booze + obscene comments to couples = valentine's day plans
Y'know, without the cops, it would've just been us daydrinking,
I woke up this morning and saw that I had transferred $0.75 from my savings account to my checking account.
You leave a trail of fuck everywhere you go
260 beers this month. I need a new hobby.
So the bartender just told me that there was numerous people who saw me having sex on the rooftop last weekend. +1
Definitely almost got hit in the face with a baby
Drank a fosters this weekend and last weekend. Listening to down under 5 times a day. Spent 100 dollars on a sleeveless men at work shirt circa 1983. We don't leave for another 5 weeks. I call it pregaming.
I'm so confused. I feel like I just intentionally took roofies to see where I'd end up.
Just don't eat pie out of the sink. It's a real blow to the self esteem.
Thanks be to the Goddess of Whores!! I straightened my bed before Ken got here. Found Calvin's boxers in the sheets!!!!
Ya he's the booze devil, like if the black hole and Bermuda triangle joined forces with Captain Morgan
It's okay, big boobs are better than running.
only 4 hours until nug lovin time
excuse me?
nug lovin. lovin nugs.
Randomize
