Yesterday I was informed there is a jewish dating website called jdate, I'm considering joining out of academic curiosity
she just threw a smoke bomb in an elevator and ran down 9 flights of stairs to see it at the bottom.
he built a boat made of joints. holyyy shit
I think my penis ruined a perfectly good friendship.
If I am going to pay someone to make me puke, it's going to be the bartender.
Half of elefante. Gelafin galaxy
One is full of apple juice. One is full of tequila. This is real russian roulette my friend.
ill give you food and tequilla and penis and joy
We're already drunk. 4 hours to go still. And there's a bear advisory. TOP WEEKEND.
I need to stop getting in the car with my dad when im rolling balls. I think he's starting to notice my eyes aren't usually completely pupil
Maybe if he'd step up his game and get a real job instead of donating plasma and trying to grow pot then you wouldn't feel compelled to write prisoners in Oregon.
That hot guy just got to class and he's eating a bagel sandwich. I dunno which I'm more attracted to
Letting Freddy Krueger eat me out = HAPPY HALLOWEEN TO ME!!!
All that stuff they told us in middle school about drugs being easy to find was a bullshit lie.
Got a $290 noise violation last night for shouting "THE KING OF THE NORTH" til 2 am
Randomize
