Yeah but my nose is so stuffed if I tried to give him head I'd suffocate
They use the phrase "final warning" so often the words have lost all meaning.
I got so high last night I started crying because i couldn't stop thinking about how scary space is
Wow my backseat really seemed a lot bigger when we were 16
I dont wanna date her. I just wanna be able to run a blacklight over her face and prove ownership.
That adds atleast one bjs worth of awkward sexual tension between us.
Thanks for stealing lime trees for me at 4:00 am. We're well on our way to having sustainable supplies for mojitos this summer.
I had fun. Till he melissa etheridged my ass and came to my window.
When did it seem like a good idea to do pull ups off the balcony? After beer 5 or shot 7?
What can I say? When alcohol is my motivation, I can move mountains.
In his defense he just bought a bong like a week ago so he's still in that honeymoon phase.
I literally stopped banging her when my ESPN app alerted me that the Spurs had won. That's how much I hate Lebron. I would rather watch him cry in the post game interviews than get it in
If I died tonight, I'd be content knowing you were the last person to see my boobs.
So anyway, I'm just floating along life with my vibrator and low expectations.
I can't say too many people would say watching their drunk best friends fuck in a hot tub is very normal.
Randomize
