I wanna do crazy things to you in a tent
fuckk wrong person
.. who was that for? a girlscout?
I may have discovered that porn hub is on my top visited sites during class this morning.
sent the pic of my tit to the wrong bbm chatroom
As soon as I saw the video camera and red light on, I started rolling my eyes when he would put it in me and telling him maybe his dick was too small cause I didn't feel anything...trust me that tape is going nowhere
some how when im high sleep beats hunger...its like how paper beats rock it doesnt make any fucking sense but it still happens
Speaking is such a hard concept right now
its sad im about to start saving up for how drunk i need to be for the holidays
tell your freshman friends. will trade sexual favors for swipes. ive got dinner tomorrow open and lunch on wed
His 21st birthday is in the middle of shark week, it's meant to be.
You know being hammered seven days in a row can do serious damage to your liver.
Text me on Monday and make sure I'm still alive
You know when you meet a penis that looks like it was made out of all your hopes and dreams?
id one day like to live in a world full of emotionless and wonderfully fullfilling sex...
My bar tender texts me around 5ish and ask what I feel like, so it's ready for me when I get home. All star service.
Dude. You are the LAST person that should live above a bar.
I'm like a hairless cat ready to be ravished
I'm drunk and in a paddle boat and my friend won't quit yelling about pandas. Does this ever happen to you?
Im so unlucky if I fell in a barrel of dicks, I'd come our sucking my thumb
Randomize
