Just found out its our ciliated mucous membrane that traps the molly when we snort it. Biology does relate to life
I vote intervention dinner around 6, make up movie around 7:30ish, then apology drinks all night. Then hangover waffle house in the morning.
She rolled over this morning and asked "did you refer to my vagina as splash mountain last night? "
A man pulled out his penis last night and when I said I wouldn't touch it, he said, "that's fine it just needs to breathe".
It sounds miserable..I have to wear a dress and it's a cash bar?
Remember when we saw my neighbor taking dick pics of himself? He's back at it!
I'm like five sips away from making a Craigslist post for true love and mustaches. My family is going to disown me tonight.
I'm thinking about slathering myself with peanut butter and going to the dog park. What's the worst that could happen?
I need five more minutes of sobbing.. AND THEN I will get back to studying
Drinking hard cider in a room full of freshman girls. Never felt so secure of my manhood
I probably wouldn't
I'd give anything to be driving a pirate ship wearing nothing but a coconut bra and a grass skirt eating a pizza and watching dolphins jump in the waves. Dreams ya gotta have dreams
Okay, so is being determined to have my vagina licked by a woman on Valentine's day an acceptable goal?
Apparently I promised everyone at the party I'd partake in various winter sports with them..
Wait wait wait. You are actually taking advice from this lunatic?
This is the girl who got a balloon full of cocaine through security no questions asked. Of course I'm taking her advice.
Valid.
You took off your shirt and pulled out a bottle of cherry uv and a slushee. That's when I knew you came to party
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