Tell me exactly where it said it wasn't a unisex bathroom.
i like that you affectionately refer to him as "creepy" ever time you talk about him
oh yeah I know that guy. he's legit. slept in my closet a few times
My penis has a 100% approval rating. He has never received a formal complaint. If you'd like to file one, you can go fuck yourself.
All I want to do is fuck in the bell tower before it leave this school. Is that too much to ask?
You made me drive your car so you could give the dude from the parking lot a BJ in the back seat. Classy.
Look outside and see if the septic tank explodes when I flush this.
You fell asleep on the toilet and he was like uh should I take her off?
PENIS EMOJIS WOULD MAKE MY LIFE SO MUCH EASIER GAH WHY DOES THE WORLD HATE ME
tuscaloosa is terrifying
like people here are just empty shells of drugs and sin
there is no mercy here
I just tried to pass the bowl to my dog for 2 minutes before I remembered she isn't human. It is 7:27 am.
either he just commented on my nose ring or he's offering me cocaine, I honestly can't tell
I mean it's up to you where you want to sleep but I'm telling you you're going to hear us have sex no matter what room you're in.
Fair enough
I am officially in a love triangle with my celebrity crush
I got conspiracy theory drunk.
Randomize
