why is it that everyone in pennsylvannia gets fucking prego??
grad school is all the worst parts of undergrad, without the binge drinking and bad decisions to make up for it
a girl just showed up to class in a zip up hoddie and sweat pants. said she over slept. i guess she got hot and unzipped it , it was only then she realized was sleeping without a shirt or bra.
the last thing i remember is fucking her. GAME CHANGER i woke up in another bedroom to her younger sister blowing me
I'm officially my mother.. Smoking in the garage pretending to take the dog out in a big ugly jacket
I will never try to masturbate with americas funniest home videos playing in the background ever again
Nah, I'm just going to keep fucking him until he realizes we're perfect for each other.
I don't know how I feel about the stuff we got from that guy. Me and Monty are driving through town listening to static at full blast...
Wrote my name backwards on the test and asked for extra credit points. Late start booze days are my new favorite thing.
so exactly what is concert sex etiquette? Before, during or after???
all of the above
I wish men found my impeccable aim when spitting into the sink attractive.
Sex should always be followed by Chinese food in bed.
You get home ok?
Uh, you stopped by my house at 4 am and woke me up, so yeah.
Sometimes a man just deserves to get woken up with a blowjob.
I puked on her cat, I think I should at least buy her breakfast
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