If I go to jail what happens to my debt?
You dont have to pay it.
I'm going to jail.
guess who was drunk and crawling in the middle of the road and got brought home by the police last night? HINT: ME
It usually only happens when Im really excited. Normally not that fast. You still enjoy it?
Can we have fireworks this year or will the ocean explode?
Please tell me you saw the asian lady with the medical mask on cutting her lawn with scissors.
Damn it, I know in the morning I'm going to regret eating out of the trash...
It's official drugs can't kill me
She took a crow from her moms Halloween decorations, taped it to her shoulder, went to the bar and made the guys buy a drinks for both her and the crow.
She's the worst person, but the best naked person
This is worse then when all the pharmacists sang me happy birthday while I was buying plan b
I saw a classic trojan enz laying on his desk. So he's probably not into the kinky shit.
I'm gonna guess ur still high cus last night at like 3am my pillows were morphing into cats and I kept trying to pet them
So, I actually said the words "but face tattoos are sexy"
I better get weekly incoherent text messages or I will assume something is wrong.
My younger brother asked me "to stop fucking his girlfriends older sisters"
Randomize
