i was just lookin through my fb pics and i think im with a cat in like 40% of them..: how sad is my life
Neighbors just bought a new bong. Got high with them and we decided to name it "Gary colemans sweet sugarlumps" these guys are hilarious
you looked up at me mid puke with tears in your eyes and asked to make sure no one took your turn at Wii
He took a shot, then proceeded to puke into the bucket he was iceing his broken foot in
One of my coworkers just invited me to a wet t-shirt contest this weekend in honor of her son's 21st Birthday.
I just beer bonged. Soco and spite please get on my levvl my hair is in buns
Well. I have your keys. You have my car. Looks like we have a drunkxican standoff.
I don't want to ruin date night, but you have no idea how hard it is to poop whilst looking at cute puppies.
My ultimate goal is to get laid wearing a horse mask... That would be awesome on all possible levels
Ya it was crazy the power went just as she was about orgasm and the vibrator got fried with the power surge
There aren't enough words in the English language to fully describe how worried I am for your dick. And the rest of you, I suppose.
Let's get drunk and take out your tonsils tonight
I PUT IT IN THE UNIVERSE THAT I WANTED TO STAB HIM AND THEN SOMEONE DID! KARMA IS A BITCH AND SHE IS BEAUTIFUL!
Glitter fights sound a lot funner in theory.
Last night I drank three beers and threw up in a tree house. I am ashamed.
Randomize
