just got my goo swallowed for the first time. colors seem so much more vivid now, and more rainbows are outside
so after he got his stomach pumped, he asked for a smoking room.
We're official. Living with your boyfriend sounds so much better than fucking your roommate.
Some asshole just brought BK into my summer class, im already high as hell, i did not need another way to not pay attention
Well he's not exactly single.. It's like an open relationship his wife doesn't know about
Watching the gap toothed girl get more ass than me is almost devastating.
mallory made a planned parenthood decision maker flow chart again.
Way to high for badminton right now. This is gonna be a shitshow.
Tomorrow, if I don't look at least 5% better than I do on a regular day to day basis, I want you to hit me and tell me that no one will ever love me if I continue to look like I just rolled out of a cocaine induced hibernation. I'm asking you for tough love.
I spent most of the night trying to drink out of three bottles of beer at once. I don't have to be told the reasons I'm single
This is Jewish guilt versus Irish Catholic guilt. We should tread carefully, or we could fuck up the space-time continuum or something.
I'm okay with that.
Just resonded to a booty call with "how much effort is required on my part?" I think I've finally reached the point of smoking too much pot
They just broke the window so they could get in and smoke the taxi driver out...
only I would find a long lost relative through a craigslist casual encounters ad
I love how u said nothing about the sidewalk sex but refused shower sex
Randomize
