absolutely 100% incorrect. and i love you more you silk skinned goddess
May have finally hit rock bottom...bouncer from the strip club informed me I wore the same shirt last night
She turned over and said "You smell like my dad, i just can't do this"
It had been so long since my last time that it was easily a double helping of stomach pancakes. I think she was mildly impressed.
I walked in on him shirtless licking the mirror while talking to his reflection. So yes, I definitely want to do shrooms the next time you get them.
you thought your balls were fighting each other...
i just wasnt prepared to have the baby of one of two french firemen. threesomes are too confusing.
First week back and I made to one class, its gonna be okay after all.
I heard that clinking noise from behind me and I already knew you were whipping out a Smirnoff in class. Again.
We weren't even through customs yet, and we got offered weed. You would love Jamaica.
In case you're wondering where my head is at right now, it's wishing that I was getting laid and not having a debate about cheese.
Oh, also as a concerning side note, my bra had drops of blood on it. So I don't know what the deal was, but someone I was around was definitely bleeding a decent amount.
We watched the first ever season of SNL and fucked for so long. He accidentally punched me in the face, but I mean, John Belushi was the background noise of our sex. I can deal with it.
This may sound strange but do you have my pants?
You tried to trade them for some girls skirt... So she has them...
when I said eat the rich I didn't mean like that but here we are sucking that capitalist dick
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