i just realized that we are the poor version of bethenny and jill from real housewives... and I'm jill. this is a 6.5 on the depressing scale
at least we're not in new jersey
Rub youre cunt and tell me you love me.
Your incorrect use of you're doesn't arouse me in the slightest.
hahah your definitly as dumb as I think I thought you are. boom roasted.
What hospital were we in last night? Insurance needs to know
i like being sick. whatever the doctor gave me is awesone. the walls are waving at me. i never want to get better.
too late I already started a fight with someone named luscious
I assume some self respect is too lofty of a gift idea
Hey, so I'm not coming into work til Friday. Some guy I've known for about 8 hours just offered me a free vacation to Maui and bought my plane ticket. He's Aussie so I'm 75% sure he won't murder me
Just got tinder matched with my COMM TA. Game on.
After that time I came to the conclusion that jeeps are the best cars to have sex in
He was stoned and starts screaming, "I ain't got but a dollar, I wanna hear waterfalls!". Maybe he can hang with us....
Things that don't wash off in the shower: black eyes and hickies.
I'll just bring the big suitcase this trip so I don't have to play wine bottle tetris again.
There's lube and condom packets all over the street we missed something awesome.
I suppose writing him up is more professional than keying his car.
Randomize
