I ahte it when I peed a little on my shews. I got a litll bit on the automen in your room too.:/
Tracy!! I don't have an ottoman in my room.
Ohhh....do you have a dog shaped liek un automan?
and when i put it inside her she yelled "welcome aboard!"
There is a man walking 2 goats through the city.
Bonus: only one of them was on a leash.
I wonder if they've ever made a porno about the song "she'll be comin' round the mountain when she comes"
i am devastated. she was DTF and I was about to puke, i told her to wait outside my room for a second. Puked. Passed out woke up, she was gone. Found puke stains on my keyboard that seem to spell out youporn....
Can we please just celebrate being alive this far into the school year and just get drunk?
Just took my birth control pill next to the cubicle where we had sex last semester.
I dont feel as bad coming home this baked because I gave my 14 year old sister a no drugs talk last night.
I just yelled at my mom for getting me circumcised without my permission. That drunk
I'm actually not sure I need to run today, between the crazy monkey sex and breaking into my own house.
The entire state will know me by my boobs.
I have a high opinion of you, you smash bitches. Respect.
Had an orgasm and got a charley horse at the same time. It was a multi-purpose scream.
If you could get me there thatd be perfect. I doubt there's extradition on the moon.
He deserves a nobel prize for his dick-giving abilities. 10/10, would ride again.
Randomize