I just had a girl text me from knoxville "come see me. we'll go for drinks and I can make you breakfast"
how do you like your eggs?
over tits
Wish I didn't live with 3 girls so I could beat off in peace.
we do all of our sexting over chat on words with friends, so my boyfriend doesn't know about it when he looks at my texts.
I thought it was kinda weird that her ten yearold sister was playing bartender, but hey, the girl makes a damn good drink
eat the baked goods on the counter at your own risk... i made them while i was angry and drunk so they most likely have pubes in them
He insisted that I looked like Kiefer Sutherland, told me he didn't know what to do about it, then hugged me awkwardly.
We are lost and the only things we have are peanut brittle, cookies and vodka. I think we'll make it.
I'm still hoping for it dude. Random north dakota pussy. If my 16 year old self knew that these were my dreams he would so try to beat me up, and i think he could.
He referred to his penis as "a gentle giant" and said I had offended it
i've been hiding in the laundry chute for like thirty minutes from her. not my manliest moment. but dude this is awesome
The amount of knuckle children I've had to the Farrah Abraham sex tape is disturbing and impressive
I'm only fucking women born in the 90s this summer
you made out with another girl for some wings
We gotta locate my vibrators and get them stashed away STAT
My son's girlfriend just thanked me for having good penis genes.
Randomize
