your profile still reads that you like women...interesting? I think there is some photography and video that will show otherwise
roommate just walked in on us. two and a half times. the half, she just knocked, sighed, and walked away.
so now she's a stripper
can't say i'm surprised
high people should be assigned attendants
so you had a one ended conversation with the toilet las night in between barfs. you kept telling the toilet how strong it was because its gone through a lot of shit in its life.
drunk me is so punny.
his penis is PERFECT
I want to put it in a shoebox and place cottonbls around it to protect it from any harm
or knit it little hat
To my wonderful winter break booty calls: thank you for making this holiday season enjoyable. I look forward to seeing you boys again this summer.
Because selling drugs to kids never goes out of business. We get older, they stay the same stupid.
Valuable lesson learned: if you reach the point where you have to talk yourself in to finishing the last half of your beer, you shouldn't try.
Do you still have "be bumpin" written on your ass in glitter pen? Who brings a glitter pen to a bar? Or pulls there ass out for that matter...
So again no comment on the cleavage. I'm a bit disappointed. If those girls come together to make cleavage AND I send you a pic of it, you have to comment on it. That's like relationship 101.
Yup. Dog walker, house sitter and mistress to the rich, bored and bi-curious. I've got a nice little operation running.
I just wanna be euthanized
Thas it
Almost gave myself a concussion stealing a stuffed unicorn hanging on a street sign but hey I got home safe
The pandemic has not made Uber drivers any less chatty.
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