Would you object to my putting the bidet video on my Facebook page? It;s awesome.
and he thought i came like four times in 2 mins. my leg just kept cramping up
If I wanted to fuck someone, I'd go for John. I'm meeting Bryan cuz I wanna get to know him better. And eventually fuck him. But not this Tuesday.
Come, dress lightly, bring tequila...
Apparently the Massachusetts Bay Transit Authority severely looks down on Chinese firedrills on a public bus
Yeah but the people love.
yea but i missed the pot and poured the boiling water on my dick. shit hurts. aint nothin easy about that mac
I went shopping for a dress that was baptism and bar appropriate.
I got a snap of someone jumping off a light pole. Was that you? Please confirm or deny. #onWisconsin
I am never drinking with the goths again.
Every Easter every single one the baby Jesus butt plug comes up
He is in my tree wearing full on scuba gear ... Get here asap.
I told you that you couldn’t eat fifty tacos, you slapped me in the face, ate seventeen tacos, and fell asleep on my floor
I think part of my soul drowned in beer and/or jack daniels last night.
Just sold my panties for 40 bucks to some rando dude at the gay bar. I think I found a way to fund next years spring break trip. Hello cancun!
Gameplan: If the cops show up, find a potted plant to hide behind... It's worked before!
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