You should get sea herpes
I mean sea horses
before i die, we are going to oregon and playing oregon trails for real. like putting things in a hat & people will pull out whether they live or die. and they die of fun things like typhoid, dysentary, or hunting accident.
It was as awful as eating cow testicles on fear factor and not winning and realizing you ate balls for nothing.
im stripping for him via video chat, but the sound is turned off cause his students are taking a test
I really hope you aren't where I think you are. Dude she has a MUSTACHE. You need Jesus..
Well I think it's fate. Considering march is my fave month because it's my birthday and st. Patrick's day. And his name is Patrick. I'm sleeping with him all through march. No question.
Remember the couple Steve and I heard and rated their sex based on the bed squeaks cuz we couldn't sleep through the noise? We got them back. They turned up the radio to drown us out.
Just watched my entire extended family eat salad out of the bowl i threw up in last night.
I SMOKED SO MUCH I SKIPPED A DAY.
Do you have any puffy paint? I want to put "fiesta muthafuckas" on my sombrero but its too much to bedazzle.
Diet Starts Tomorrow! Guy from McDonalds asked if I got a new car...
All I'm saying is that if you have time for a 20 min shower bj you have time for me
I love 3rd shift and working at a hotel I just had a late night booty call while I was getting paid..could life get any better??
Our nipples touched last night. It was tender.
She referred to my balls as rotund and handsome
Randomize
