Literal conversation "you are ________ ____. you facebook friended me"
what kind of vibe do I give off that a guy i've never hung out with thinks its okay to send me a picture of his ball cleavage?
He has some good qualities. Beneath the layers of asshole and fat.
Careful when you walk in I'm laying by the door.
the only thing coherent you said from what i saw of you is when you were throwing up, i asked if you were done and you just "uh huh you know what it is"
God my Facebook chat is a graveyard of old blowjobz
My roommate didn't flush after her miscarriage. Time to drink myself blind. I need you for moral support. Or so I don't have to drunkenly cry alone anymore. Whatever, help.
We had sex in the tent after his 6th beer and while we were at it we had conversations with the people outside the tent.
Instead of sending me a picture of his dick, he sent me a drawing of it on drawsomething. This game is getting out of control.
But I wanna cuddle and just put my hand awkwardly close to your penis area by accident and look at you
I can't help the fact that i'm turned on by white boys that look like Jesus
I'm still drunk dear. I just woke up 3 feet from the front door with 20 dollars worth of taco bell in my hands.
im ready to get drunk and forget everything ive learned this semester
He had a temporary tattoo of Justin Bieber on his dick and I still had sex with him
Too high to wash a dish but just high enough for a kitchen fire
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