hey no worries the mystery has been solved- i jst sneezed and my undies popped outta my nose.
im so horny i just used my electric toothbrush to masturbate. god help me
Let's hear it for middle of the street handjobs ladies and gentlemen
I just signed a document stating that I would dd all summer if they would go pickup food.
throwing condoms aimed at his crotch probably isn't the politest way to ask for sex
i have rugburns grass stains and some road rash. im an all terrain slut
The strip club called, they have your shoe.
Ok so in the last 18 months I have now driven four different dudes into counseling. I'm like heroin with a vagina.
Her boobs felt like beanie babies from heaven
After I came she just held my balls until I fell asleep. It was like adult swaddling. Magical...
I thought since you asked to see my dick I might as well say hi
WINE AND FILM. TALK ABOUT AN UPGRADE FROM NETFLIX AND CHILL.
You know I base where I go on the likelihood of me getting laid there. This includes work.
So what happened at girls night? My roomate found me passed out locked out on the front steps of the house and it was raining. Yes low moment
But you''re still having sex with him. And a hobo convinced you to.
Randomize
