I love you!
You're insane
Fuckin crazy man! Seriously though I think if you would have me I honestly seriously think about marrying u!
Alright now lets video chat so I can xshow u my dick! Hahahaha
we're drinking boxed wine and eating string cheese. It's like a wine tasting for poor people.
I want to see you every morning in the kitchen ass naykid on roller blades making pancakes.
Stop sending me these texts. This is your mom, not your girlfriend.
His mom just described him as a manipulative, deceitful bastard -- oddly I still want him
You were spooning my trash can and I had to crumble cookies on the floor by your face to get you to eat
I'm on his itunes. He has a sex playlist. It's actually not so much a playlist as 12 Kylie Minogue songs with a big gay Whitney finish.
Don't blame the cocaine for your eating disorder.
The calves of my jeans are covered in jello shots from Sunday, how desperate do I have to be before I start licking them?
Just had a random flashback of you tickling some guy's nipple with your claw ring, and then him moaning and stripping in the middle of the bar. You give good memories.
I'm about 95% it's a collapsed lung. Go big right?
And then the templeton police were like "oh I remember her, yeah the blue haired girl that we picked up cause she was passed out drunk on the side of the road"
I have an aggressive hickey on my shoulder and it actually hurts.
He looks like a Mormon from a lifetime movie. Oddly I wanna give him a hand job
...hi
YOU SHOULD BE ASHAMED OF YOURSELF
Ok cool I was afraid you'd never speak to me again. I can work with this.
Don't try to butter me sideways
That is without a doubt the most Southern thing you have ever said.
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