There was a point where some of my friends attempted 'moi's', which stands for makeout on introduction.
It involved going up to women and very aggressively trying to make out with them upon meeting them
Surprisingly the success rate was exceedingly high
Just spent the rest of my time at that bar trying to keep a probs underage closet gay from touching my kitten to prove he still likes girls.
chicago's viagra triangle is not unlike the bermuda triangle in thatt things just get lost...... planes, ships, dignity, virginity, etc.
All i remember before i blacked out is you pointing to a random chick and telling me to bang her for America.
just saw someone whip out a flask during lecture... I think I found a study partner
i can't understand anything he's saying. But he spells alcohol right everytime so i deciphered it.
Now I have to set an alarm for less than 6 hours from now to wake her up, get her showered and get her to her first day of tutoring a kid from her church. WTF is my life?
it was like fucking a Mumford & Sons song
YO I WASNT TRYING TO MAKE A PASS AT YOU.... Or Jesus
BRING KITTENS I AM A GENIUS
Someone called asking about the gate code and I said "hashtag" for # instead of "pound." Ugh. I feel so dirty.
Last night was great... In the "I got videotaped making out and getting a handjob on the couch in front of 100 people." kinda way.
I’m also apparently a very socialist drunk now
Instead of a horny one. All I want to fuck is capitalism these days.
What's a sexy way to say balls deep???
I definitely almost just pulled a condom out of my purse instead of money for my dad.
Randomize
