Professor used "ROFL" while grading my paper... Do I even go to a real college?
I think her nose is broken... but I think she's just drunk enough to fall for the whole "sex releases endorphins, so it'll feel better" line.
woke up with a sweatshirt on that said "someone special calls me grandma" and a sword. i'm just going to assume that it was a good night
I have no idea. After the fireworks it all went to shit. Do you know why I woke up with a road sign?
Maybe if i steal enough bar glasses i can justify all the money spent i've spent there
Apparently Bin Ladens last act of terrorism is cock blocking me....
She was standing in the road flagging traffic in a tshirt and boxers. I didn't stop.
All she wanted was a cigarette
It's like the last supper of drinking before the summer ends
They left at like 4. I got up to help clean their house this morning and we found his pants. No ones heard from him, we're all a little scared.
Wow, nothing is more special than changing the channel and seeing the guy who groped you on Saturday night...
My catholic guilt is strong, but the alcohol is stronger.
What changed your mind?
Being sober
I was able to hide the fact that I had just shit in my pants, and then wupped her ass at FIFA
the last thing i remember was the norwegian kid tacking a bag of wine to the ceiling, then boom! shower drain.
I had one beer! ONE BEER! They took shots in mourning of my tolerance last night. My ability to drink is a joke.
Randomize
