Dude that chick in the corner just threw up
Hot
im in Michaels with rachel and i see a little boy jumping around and waving a rainbow pompom. Welcome to our team little one
As soon as I saw the video camera and red light on, I started rolling my eyes when he would put it in me and telling him maybe his dick was too small cause I didn't feel anything...trust me that tape is going nowhere
You came in at two thirty, wearing your underwear and a tie then asked where you could find a sombrero and a pair of stilletos that would fit your men's size thirteen feet.
Nah it's cool, I made him pinky promise me he wouldn't die if I left him passed out in the bathroom.
It got kind of awkward when her dad brought home a 20 something asian girl at 3am
If you value my life, if you value your own, please look for that godforsaken cookie. Please.
I don't want to die alone with cake watching shows about cake
Let's fuck under the stars. And by under the stars I mean in my bed underneath my glow in the dark star stickers.
I was going to try being motivated today. But then I took a hit while still in bed.
I'm sorry I didn't get you anything for your birthday
It's just you didn't get me the fucking bear suit last year
Will Smith has a direct hotline to my emotions
last night I learned that if you try to buy tacos in this town, that you will be stopped by three cop cars with breathalizers
I just had mom give me advice about how and where to store my lube in my shower. It was super awkward. Of course, she also walked in on me masturbating once so I guess turnabout is fair play
tell me about the fingering
Randomize
