Theres a random in my bed. Omg but at least he's a law student?
forecast for tonight- shitshow with a chance of tbell
my version of bright and sunny.
Cute you're picking friends over dick. I feel like this is the trailer for a lifetime movie.
yesterday, he said he didn't trust me around his daughter because "if she was wrapped in rolling paper u'd smoke her." yup.
Well i tried snorting sugar. so either that made me puke or the fact that i drank water from a fish tank
i gave her a can of corn and told her the cabs are accepting non perishable food items over the holidays. blatant lie and she lives like $40 away
I found him CRAWLING across the garden. He saw me,smiled,and asked for a napkin.
Woke up chewing my pillow from a dream where I was scarfing Cajun pasta from TGI Friday's. That's a new level of fat, even for us
All i remember about last night is holding a bottle of bacardi and screaming challenge accepted!
I think I shall call his penis Gatsby. We talk about it all the time, but I never see it.
His lack of social graces and moral fiber complements mine nicely.
He pretended his dick was a samurai sword and that he was slaying me with it is it bad I still wanted him to fuck me
You can't die you're my only democrat family member
Nothing like waking up and having two guys who aren't your boyfriend talk to you about their hard dicks before 9 am.
The party bus is stocked with 5 hour energies and beer and someone handing out adderall. Best. Wedding. Ever.
Randomize
