I'm sitting at the gyno watching cnn in the waiting room
Everyone is walking funny when they come out, ugh I'm not looking forward to this
Please tell me how I woke up out in the middle of nowhere wearing nothing but a hard hat and a man thong?
last time i saw her she was begging the broken jukebox to play lady gaga.
no seriously. she's even got the premier of the real L word on her calendar at work. that lesbian.
Just used your umbrella as a puke sheild. Thanks man.
We're doing it in the traditional way of discussing why we dislike each other while sharing a bowl. Just like the natives do.
This bitch rocks a fuckin fanny pack and still manages to lose her phone at every thirsty thursday
FYI, grandma is already drunk and using a bed sheet as a table cloth.
Just broke my collar bone. May not make it to the party.
Broeke and glass. I feel so and. Appilogixe in morbing.
I'll remember. Also, I owe you 200 for a pair of shoes that I carelessly bought to improve my spinal structure, to improve my health and ensure that I love to be 300 years old. Like Adam. Of the bible.
Just because you are home alone for the weekend doesn't mean you can act like a nudist.
I accept your opinion but respectfully disagree. Also, I'm sitting in your chair.
Are you ok? Who pooped in my office?
I just realized u compared me to a coconut
Why is the toilet broken? Why did I wake up naked in the shower, hugging a bath mat? WHY IS THE TOILET BROKEN?
Is it just clogged or something?
No! There are actual chunks of toilet on the floor.
Randomize