yeah she is the one who tells people i beat girls.. which ironically make me want to punch her in the face
so that wasnt chicken after all
we got back to my place and he started talking about feelings. i politely told him to leave and that he managed to cock block himself.
Your ass just called me, someone was yelling "awful waffle" and also, " I don't know who's hands are who's anymore"
did mom hear me barking???
oooooh yeah. good luck explaining that one
sooo high. sooo many dog friends
He has until sunday, then my legs are officially closed to him
Yeah I remember I tried to close her head in the freezer last night
It is way too early in the summer for me to be coming into work still drunk.
The goal for tonight is vagina. In and around. Doesn't matter who. How. Or why.
Know what was probably a bad idea? Using white wine as a mixer for vodka.
As a plus, I've lost 5 pounds in two days, so "party all weekend" is officially a valid diet plan.
Did I tell you guys I was bisexual last night? I just had a flashback
Anyone who does not consider cereal and wine as a balanced breakfast needs to leave immediately.
What's the best way to tell a guy he can call me when his impending divorce is finalized?
I love you.
Bad choice
Randomize
